Joaquin Phoenix raps (you have been warned) ...

Jeremy Piven urges Americans to check their mercury levels, and says play producers' complaint is "absurd and outrageous" ...

Much younger girlfriend says John Cleese has "the package of a 19-year-old" ...

Courtney Love sounds a wee bit anti-Semitic ...

Robert Downey, Jr. slips into high heels ...

Anti-abortion activists are angry at Dunkin' Donuts ...

Kelly Osbourne is arrested after slapping columnist for calling her fiancé 'stupid' ...

Carlos Slim Helu considers expanding his fractional ownership of the New York Times ...

Bank of America gets another twenty billion dollar handout ...

Treasury Dept regulators covered up for IndyMac Bancorp and other failing banks ...

Has Steve Jobs of Apple been just an eentsy weentsy bit too secretive? ...

Bedlam breaks out at Circuit City ...

Customer sues Staples over $8,000 per gallon printer ink ...

Veep Joseph Biden was offered his choice -- Vice President or Secretary of State ...

Google terminates six services ...

Shia LaBeouf has his driver's license revoked ...

Emma Thompson moves her Oscars out of the bathroom ...

50 Cent launches a movie production company ...

Top Chef's Tom Colicchio pulls a Heimlich maneuver ...

Senator Ted Kennedy has a seizure at lunch ...

Carlos Slim Helu drops a quarter-billion dollars into the New York Times ...

Mike Myers and Paris Hilton lead Razzie nominations ...

Writers on "reality shows" like The Bachelor win millions in lawsuit ...

President Obama booty-bumps with a 9th-grader ...

George Clooney is reportedly scrubbing up for ER ...

Sex and the City gets sequelized ...

Val Kilmer hints again that he might run for Governor of New Mexico ...

Bradley Whitford and Richard Jenkins head for Joss Whedon's Cabin in the Woods ...

Former French President Jacques Chirac is hospitalized after being mauled by his clinically depressed poodle ...

Dirk Benedict is none too fond of the new Battlestar Galactica ...

Parents Television Council worries that Britney Spears song includes the f-word ...

Tickets or no tickets, First Lady Michelle Obama opens the White House ...

Interior Secretary Dirk Kempthorne offers a going-away tribute to himself ...

Embattled Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich's wife gets fired ...

Did Nazi doc Josef Mengele spawn a Brazilian town of twins? ...

Jessica Alba has a few choice words for Bill O'Reilly ...

Scott Adams uses "Dilbert" strip as a billboard ...

Former Merrill Lynch CEO John A. Thain is looking for a new office to redecorate for a million bucks ...

Silly-looking Fidel Castro says President Obama is "absolutely sincere", but Obama inherits George W. Bush's Google bombs ...

Aretha Franklin had the coat already, but needed the hat to set it off ...

Brad Pitt doesn't Google himself, but Robert Downey, Jr. does ...

Either this website is an elaborate parody, or some die-hard Hillary Clinton for President believers are a little grudgey ...

Pope Benedict XVI reverses excommunication for Bishop who's a holocaust denier ...

Charges filed in alleged John Travolta extortion plot ...

President Obama tells Republican leaders to turn off Rush Limbaugh ...

Mad magazine slows to quarterly ...

Joe DiMaggio was "very economical" ...